You Make A Difference.

No matter what your job title or familial role is, your birth order, your social circle, or your religious views, you make a difference in the lives of others. Every day. With your presence and in your absence. And you will likely never realize how many lives you touched by the time you leave this earth. I believe in eternal souls and I often wonder if when a soul enters heaven, they will see the impact of their lives on others. The thought is always abruptly cut off because my earthly brain gets too technical and requires too much structure of the unknown to satisfy the question. There are no answers, but still the thought persists. It persists because of my desire for people to fully know how much their love was received.

Today I learned that a staff person at our accounting firm died. I was completely blindsided by the announcement and have been incredibly emotional over it. She was not a CPA nor was she likely the highest paid person there. But, as highlighted by her absence, she was an integral piece in holding the whole operation together. And she was my person. She was my connection to the firm. She carried out all of the seemingly little interactions between her side and mine. She was my person for 12 years. She was the one who called me to relay information in brief 30-second conversations. (I could see her smiling through the phone each time which made me smile in return.) She was the one who greeted me with the most amazing little smirk when I arrived to pick up my financial statements. She billed our office for services she didn’t personally provide yet worked through any questions I ever had regarding payments and invoices. She transferred my calls to the accountants, always with that smile. She was the one who shared joy. She shared the most joy because she had the most opportunities with me. During all of these “insignificant” moments of exchange, moments of time together, she shared so much joy. Through her stories, I knew she loved her mother and her daughter immensely. She generously shared her excitement over her engagement and subsequent wedding. She shared joy through telling me about her weekend plans and she even got me a little excited about the Chiefs from time-to-time. Her smile and the little cock of her head topped with a streak of vivid color became so familiar and so comforting, especially when you think about the fact that we never saw each other outside of these frequent business transactions. I looked forward to our interactions because it was more than just passing envelopes back and forth. I anticipated her mannerisms and her laughter. Not as well as so many others, but I knew her. I appreciated her. Her loss is significant.

We make connections with people when we least expect it yet we continue to take each other for granted every day. Baristas, food vendors, colleagues, coworkers from another department but we see them in the stairwell or elevator several times a week, the janitorial staff we pass on our way out of the office every evening, car mechanics, sanitation workers… All of the people in our lives that we see once or routinely have an impact on our lives. We often call them acquaintances, even if we don’t really know or always remember their names. And this usually goes both ways; therefore, we must remember we have an impact on theirs, too. Whether we smile or scowl makes an impact, even if neither of us realize it. Our tone of voice, whether we hold the door for someone, whether we pay more attention to our phone or the person standing next to us, paying it forward in the drive-thru or coffee line… It all matters. You matter. She mattered.